Mark stabbed himself today. I know not really funny, but you need to know Mark to understand, he really doesn't take much seriously. He really cracks me up sometimes.
Anyway, he and a rep were looking at knives this arvo, when he accidentally stabbed himself in the back.
The knives were on the counter and somehow he managed to catch a knife with his jumper, which slid along the counter a bit before lodging against a wooden upright thing, causing the knife to imbed itself in his back. The rep says 'oh did that get you', 'Nah only a nick' says mark, as he is feeling around behind him to feel what really happened. The knife was sticking out of his back near his hip. What does he do with it, pull it out of course, what else would you do with it, right. The rep takes a look and says 'well you probably want to put something over that', packs his stuff and hightails it out of the shop.
Mark being the boyscout that he is thinks well I have bandaids in the drawer, but cant see the nick myself, will get the boys working next door to stick one on for me. Long story short they wouldn't touch it, no way, you have to go to the doc for that one.
So he rings me at home. 'Um can you come into the shop for a bit, you might need to take me to the doctor, I have done something really silly' and hangs up. No worries, knowing Mark as I do I straight away think its ok he has only cut himself, must be worse than usual. Grab a towel just in case, not really knowing what had happened.
In the shop he is walking around with his hand behind his back, 'where have you cut yourself this time I ask', and get a really stupid look. 'Um, I stabbed myself in the back' he says and turns around to show me the blood all over his clothes. 'Not a problem' he says, just take me to the Doc so he can chuck a stitch in it.
At the shop I have found the offending weapon, a lovely knife with blood half way up the blade. Oh my, that really cant be good.
The Doc has had to do internal and external stitches to hold him together.
In true form of the converted he says to me, 'get out the camera and take a photo of the knife', complete with blood still on it (hope he doesn't expect me to scrap it too).
We take the shot with a ruler near the knife, the blade had gone in nearly 13cm, without hitting anything vital.
All he can say is ' just imagine what the Doc is writing in his records'. Then he proceeded to come up with the silliest things, really, he has just had a knife sticking out of him and he is still joking around. Everytime I look at him I start laughing, honestly, only Mark could manage to do what he did and still find the funny side of it.
The offending weapon.